Breaking the stereotype…
We have been taught that pictures of women in lingerie or men in boxers is sexual, that the naked body is a sexual sight. In the boudoir industry it is so much more than that.
It's a much more emotional experience, it's putting yourself in an incredibly vulnerable state. Boudoir is meant to empower the subject not please the audience.
I recently stumbled upon and article that bashed boudoir for being “fiancé porn, porn for your significant other, a scam by a man to convince their woman to take sexy pictures so they don’t leave them or so they don’t look at other women, anti-feminist…” and I can’t help but think the author has clearly not done their research or spoken to any of us in this industry or anyone who has ever experienced a boudoir shoot. In an effort to paint boudoir in a negative light by saying it's just porn, it's just sexual exploitation, people are only doing it so their significant other won’t watch porn or look at anyone else, they put women back into a box. Why can’t we feel empowered in our skin without someone saying it’s sexual, why in the name of feminism are you putting women down for feeling good about themselves or their reasoning behind wanting shoot?
Boudoir is a personal choice and an intimate portrait experience but it’s not a sexual experience. We often confuse intimate with sexual. The intimacy of boudoir comes from looking inward and allowing yourself the freedom to bare it all. It’s looking at yourself and being in love with who you are. It’s putting yourself in a situation to break out of your comfort zone and unleash the fierceness within.
Almost 99% of our clients have come to us for boudoir as a gift to themselves, they want to experience boudoir for themselves not their spouse or partner, so they feel empowered and free. Even the few that start off as a gift for a significant other quickly becomes a gift for themselves.
If you’ve ever had the chance to experience boudoir you know it goes beyond half naked pictures.
Each of our clients have their own reasons but the most common reason is to fall in love with their body again, to feel confident. Almost everyone I know has had body image issues at least once in their life. Whether its pregnancy, weight gain, weight loss, mental health issues, surgeries etc. Everyone has their own reasoning behind wanting to experience boudoir.
Boudoir is about feeling confident in your own skin, being confident in who you are. It's not to say “hey look how hot I am!” It's more “I love myself and my body and I want to celebrate me”. Boudoir is an expression of self love, not objectification of the body. Self love is not selfish, it's vital finding your self worth, to being confident in who you are. It is 100% ok to express how much you love yourself and love your body.
One of our favorite things during a session is the moment a client gets a peak at themselves through the view finder and we hear “That’s me?!”. The confidence boost is almost instantaneous! That “AHA!” Moment is one we live for, its the moment our clients achieve what they came to do! It’s not about looking sexy for someone else, or posing in lingerie. It’s getting vulnerable with yourself and allowing yourself the freedom to express yourself, to let that confidence shine through. (Link portfolio from website)
I personally struggled for years with loving myself. I thought I needed be a different size to love my body and that my size dictated my value. How wrong I was.
I’m a mom of two, I had them fairly young and struggled with how quickly my body changed and never went back to its previous state. I hated my stretch marks, the mom pouch, the less than perky breasts. I wasn’t confident, I was incredibly self conscious, I struggled to love the woman in the mirror. Not just physically but mentally. I was timid, unsure of who I really was. I spent years looking in the mirror at all of the imperfections, all of the things I wish were different wishing I had the balls to dye my hair or wear what a crop top. I became a mom and a wife and I thought that’s who I was and I didn’t know who I was, those roles were what I thought defined me. Then something beautiful happened, my husband asked me to hop in front of the camera for him to get some practice with boudoir photography. For the first time I saw what he saw. It was truly empowering to see myself in a way I hadn’t before. It wasn’t because I looked sexy or hot, its because I let the walls down, I stepped out of my comfort zone and man am I glad I did!!